Addiction and Recovery

A guy in his mid-thirties with a poorly concealed receding hairline sits in his mom's kitchen and talks about why 12-Step programs can do more harm than good.

Dangers and Drawbacks of 12-Step Programs Like Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous

I've been extensively involved in 12-Step programs like Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous for a good chunk of my adult life, but I've become disillusioned with them. This video explains why I believe that they can be unhelpful and even dangerous.

2 days ago1 min read

Scene from the 2012 romantic drama Keep the Lights On, which shows two well-dressed, 30ish men with blonde hair facing each other against an urban backdrop; the man facing the camera wears a complex expression of hurt, sadness, and love on his face.

Dating / Engaged to / Married to an Addict? Nine Questions to Help Determine the Future of Your Relationship

Nine questions to help you determine whether you should stay in a relationship with a partner who is struggling with addiction.

Apr 2731 min read

A sweaty, shaky methadone patient (me) explaining the sh*tshow that is and always has been his life.

Video Intro to My Opioid / Benzo Addiction Story + Update on Methadone Taper

Twenty years of opioid / benzo addiction in the U.S. and abroad during the apex of the failed War on Drugs. Update on my speedrun of methadone detox.

Apr 204 min read

DreamVR Pod for use with Dice (ladicetrole) treatment

FDA Approved: Dreams Do Come True With Dice (Ladicetrole)

Dice (ladicetrole) is part of a novel group of combined pharmacologic / virtual reality treatments known as Positive Visualization Actualizers (PVAs).

Apr 133 min read

Movie poster for Beautiful Boy, which shows David Sheff, played by Steve Carell, with his arm around his son, Nic Sheff, played by Movie poster for Beautiful Boy, which shows a sepia photograph of David Sheff, played by Steve Carell, with his arm around his son, Nic Sheff, played by Timothée Chalamet. .

Beautiful Boy: Not Quite It (Movie Review)

A conflicted review of the 2018 movie Beautiful Boy, which is about a father who is losing his talented, beloved son to crystal meth.

Apr 617 min read

Alcoholics Anonymous emblem with "Service, Unity, and Recovery" written along the three sides of a black triangle with "AA" written in its center and a black circle circumscribed around the entire design

Butternutters Still at It: Syracuse's Renegade AA Group With a Body Count

The Butternutters are a renegade Syracuse AA group who deny the reality of mental illness and advocate detox without medical supervision.

Mar 236 min read

Lobby of the Four Seasons Hotel in Guangzhou, China

Cotard's Delusion Among Addicts With Near-Death Experiences: Are We Already Dead?

Am I dead already? Incidence of the strange belief system called Cotard's delusion among addicts with Near-Death Experiences (NDE).

Mar 168 min read

A page from Carl Jung's Red Book, which shows a prophet / wise old man with wings hovering above a temple-like building, with palm trees below him to the left and a Garden-of-Eden-like scene featuring a coiled snake below him on his right.

Carl Jung, the Red Book, and Shadow Work

Intro to Jungian psychology, including shadow work and its implications for recovery from addiction.

Mar 89 min read

A photo of a Dark Web drug market called Nightmare, which features listings of thousands of illegal and legal psychoactive chemicals, including methamphetamine, MDMA, and heroin.

Nitazenes (Benzimidazole Opioids): The Next Battle of the War on Drugs?

Info on nitazenes, also called benzimidazole opioids, a group of potent, synthetic opioids that are increasing in prevalence in the U.S.

Mar 113 min read

A young man in a t-shirt standing in the front yard of a typical suburban house, with five iron prison bars in between him and the road that the house is on.

Social Prisoner Theory

Is modern society becoming an open-air prison?

Feb 164 min read

D.A.R.E. Nation: What I Would Say to My Younger Self About Doing Drugs

My thoughts on the D.A.R.E. anti-drug curriculum that I grew up with & what I would say to my younger self about drugs.

Feb 910 min read

Snapshot: An Addict Remembers 9/11

A story from a New Yorker who was addicted to heroin at the time of the September 11, 2001, terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center.

Feb 23 min read

Taking a Break

My thoughts on the "two arrow" model of pain vs. suffering from DBT.

Jan 2610 min read

Scientific Frontiers: Deep Brain Stimulation (DBS) as Addiction Treatment

Exploring deep brain stimulation (DBS) of the nucleus accumbens as a treatment for refractory addiction to opioids and other substances.

Jan 189 min read

Chemical Blitzkrieg: Four Elements of the Modern War on Drugs That Originated in Nazi Germany

The intriguing history of the Third Reich and mind-altering drugs, including amphetamines and opioids. Based on Norman Ohler's "Blitzed."

Jan 510 min read

Four Scenes, Five Bathrooms, Twenty Years: Heroin Addiction Revealed

Four short scenes depicting the surreal highs and lows of heroin addiction, all of which are based on experiences that I lived through.

Jan 14 min read

Smooth Seas, Seasoned Sailors: Lessons From Relapse

Tough truths garnered from relapse, including a series of recent slip-ups during my methadone taper.

Dec 29, 202413 min read

Amputations Increase as Tranq (Xylazine) Crisis Intensifies in U.S.; Users Denied Detox

As the veterinary tranquilizer xylazine (tranq) infiltrates the U.S. drug supply, a public health crisis builds.

Dec 15, 202425 min read

What Heroin Feels Like: Three Addicts Describe the Feeling That They Were Willing to Die For

Three addicts describe what it feels like to inject heroin.

Dec 1, 20248 min read

The Tao Te Ching (道德经): Eastern Spirituality and Recovery from Addiction

Thoughts on the Tao Te Ching (道德经; "Book of the Way"), a Chinese spiritual treatise on flow, balance, and right action.

Nov 23, 20248 min read